Yesterday morning was my second, gulp, mammogram. The first one was back in 2011, after much hounding from both my regular doctor and my gynecologist. To be honest, the first physical experience wasn’t as bad as anticipated, but the psychological effects were enormous because I was called back for more X-rays! It turned out to be nothing, but that was something that has delayed this second mammogram for a very long time.
I arrived 45 minutes earlier than my appointed time yesterday. They ask that you be there 15 minutes before your appointment to fill out forms, but the bus got me there much sooner than I’d expected. Filling out the forms and answering questions was all routine; nothing out of the ordinary. Then I was given a robe and directed to a changing room. After changing, everyone sits in their robe and waits for the doctor to call them. When the doctor called my name and saw me, she thought I looked familiar from the last exam, but it turns out that it wasn’t her who performed my mammogram the other time. She was really nice, though. She asked if I remembered what to do, but I assured her that I’d blocked the last time from my memory! Thus I walked up to the contraption and opened up my robe while she placed my ta-tas (one at a time) in the medieval torture device that squeezes the life out of them. It’s been awhile since I’ve been groped so thoroughly. My breasteses are of the smaller A-cup variety, which makes it more difficult to “arrange” on said torture device, as well as (I’m assured) makes it more painful. The doctor admitted that it’s easier to do with bigger breasts. “How in the world do you get a man’s breasts in here then?! I asked. She said that, although men obviously USUALLY have smaller breasts than women (!), they do NOT have breast tissue. Without breast tissue, they have little to no feeling there so don’t mind being twisted and turned every which way for breast selfies. After the initial two breast smashings/photos, there were two more; I’m assuming two top/bottom views, then two side views. I took a deep breath before going in for the second round of torture. Now that it’s all said and done, it wasn’t THAT bad. She said that my results will be sent in the mail. She also mentioned that she noticed in my records that I’d been called back the last time. To put my mind at ease, she showed me the X-ray that had given the doctors some concern, then showed me the follow-up one, which cleared up any thoughts that there were issues. Now my breasteses and I shall sit home and wait, but I’m thinking positive.